Self-Esteem Enhancement - Lowering False Self-Esteem
(Bullying, Controlling, Neurotic & Victim Behaviour)
Pseudo-Self-Esteem (Neurotic Pride) leads to Separateness & Insecurity
Healthy, high self-esteem is characterised by an open mind and flexible, warm, friendly, outgoing personality with a high standard of personal conduct. There is self-respect and self-love, combined with respect for others ("You're OK, I'm OK"). Parents' levels of self-esteem, be they high or low, encourage the development of equivalent personal value and build self-confidence in their children. Arrogance is avoided when personal confidence is balanced with humility - the ability to recognise and acknowledge the specialness of others.
High self-esteem people can afford to be compassionate, kind and generous to others because thay are not easily exploited, bullied or manipulated.
You may not always like what they say but you know where you stand with them and you can trust their honesty and integrity.
Unhealthy, Low self-esteem is characterised by more closed, rigid, defensive (territorial hostility) and often either insensitive or self-deprecating behaviors, judgements and opinions. The world is repeatedly experienced as abusive, threatening, demanding or unsupportive, which leads to free-flowing anxiety or constant frustration and anger.
Victimhood, self-hatred, over-work (over-doing things), narcissistic self-promotion or self-recrimination are common underlying dynamics in low self-esteem despite superficial behaviour involving arrogance and denigration of others ("stabbing people in the back", malicious gossip, high-handed criticism).
If the anger is internalized i.e. held within us, then experiences of hostility, rejection, isolation and depression will become intensified over a period of time (see Anger Management & Release).
Ingrained feelings of inadequacy and a deep inner fear of inferiority is defended (hidden, compensated for) by false self-esteem (also known as neurotic pride) which is a sense of personal value and safety based on accumulation of achievements, power or status, combined with denigration of other people, aggressive emotions, control, bullying, fear, manipulation or exploitation of others.
Low self esteem adults or kids are experienced by others as "difficult", "manipulative", "demanding", "miserable", "negative", "stressful" or "draining"! They tend to generate stress and weariness in the people around them in the home, workplace or even in leisure activities. The subconscious agenda and perception underlying false self-esteem are:
"Neither of us is really OK, but I'm going to prove to you / make you think that I am!"
Maintaining neurotic pride takes up lots of our time and energy. Letting go of these behaviours and healing the underlying wounds, negative self-beliefs and judgements puts us in touch with:
- solid personal value, experiencing mutual love and respect in relationships
- freedom and aliveness not based on the constantly vulnerable pedestal of being in control or being superior
Self-esteem Enhancement Courses & Workshops: UK Personal Development & Assertiveness Training
~ WAYS & RESOURCES TO RAISE SELF-ESTEEM ~
your search will open in a new "window"
Boost Self-Esteem & Self-confidence due to PROJECTION OF FEELINGS & PERSONAL POWER onto others.
Toxic Shame as a Source of Low Self-Esteem Ego Traps: Spiritual Self-Image
Protect Yourself against Attacks driven by Low Self-Esteem: Psychic Protection & Energy Vampires
Be Yourself? - Who is That? - How do I do it?
Your mind lusts after "content" - to feed it's own self-importance and sense of control. But YOU are not your life story, personal history, talents or list of achievements, failures, victimhoods, possessions or assets. Underneath these fragile, vulnerable and lose-able "noises" of your life is the STILLNESS and PEACE of your pure natural divine self. "God" or "Goddess" is the deepest essential nature of who you are - a particle, ray or aspect of the greater "God" or "Goddess" - the "Universal Oneness" or "Great Spirit". You are here in this lifetime to have a series of earthly human experiences (the "game" of life - the greatest most dramatic game in the universe!) but at the deepest level you are NOT those everyday-world experiences that you take on as your IDENTITY - your sense of self.
Low & High Esteem in Healthy & Unhealthy Relationships: Toxic Relationships
Bullying & Harassment in School or Workplace: Help for Bullying Problems
Potential Cure for Depression & Bipolar Disorder: Transcend Ego Dramas
You are the Result of the Love of Thousands!
Soul Loss & Soul Retrieval - Shamanic Healing of Low Self-Esteem